Creative Bridges

In & Out Lists and Other Things

Wow, it’s been a while since I’ve written anything. I reckon I needed a break because so many things have happened, especially in the last three months. But I feel so much creative energy to write more here, on my book, my songs, and share them with the world. So here it goes it!

Also for the folks who decided to give to the TMC EOY campaign, thank you so much! We still have to update the number online but we’ve received almost $29,000 in donations, which aggressively overshot our $12,000 goal.

Family Special

One thing that gave me a lot of life in 2024 was sharing stories about my family, relationship dynamics, and just general things about my life. If you scroll through my feed on IG you’ll probably see that, at least view-wise, my followers also enjoyed that content most. It’s not like I don’t enjoy making the mini lessons that I sometimes post, it’s just that those mini lessons often get buried in hate comments. I’m just not about that life I think.

What I am about is the hundreds of lovely messages that I received from people who have been touched by our lives. I am touched by their lives too.

Like the one time someone’s conservative brother came to see me speak at a conference to see what all those “progressives were all about.” It happened to be one of the talks on bridge building where I challenge my audience to invite conservatives in, because that’s what Jesus would do.

Or that time that I got a novel sent in my DM from a woman. She had just started to deconstruct but still had a lot homophobic mental models in her head. She told me that my resistance to alienation gave her space to reconcile those parts in her life in her time.

But possibly the best love that I receive online is when I hear people’s responses to Kim’s and my marriage. Yes, like every couple we have our ups and downs. I came out later in life and, while she had some reservations at first, she is 100% happy I transitioned. So moving forward I plan on sharing more of what makes me and us human; the love, the conflicts, and how we live life together.

This Week’s Special

I don’t really make in and out lists but I do enjoy seeing them floating around. I have my own version of it called a 20/5 list. You basically write down 25 of your goals for the year, cut down 20, and only say yes to 5 for the year. It’s meant to give you focus and I’ll probably work on a similar list again this week.

What I can say though is that consuming news is out. I know that sounds harsh but I’m dead serious. I’ve already cut down on my news consumption but in the last three months I have just open up Semafor once a day and consider myself informed. Semafor typically reports about highlights in the US and has a more global coverage of things and, most importantly, doesn’t update and re-update news stories ad nauseam.

For instance, remember when Biden was about to drop out? Every. Single. Day. the NYT reported that today was the day he really was going to do it. Or the ceasefire talks in Gaza? That time, the outlets claimed we were definitely close to a ceasefire deal. We have a warranted criticism of social media but most news outlets are using the exact same topics as social media; creating a constant desire to be updated by the latest things and come back for more.

I can tell you without any reservation that my mental health has benefited hugely from consuming less media in general. So I reckon I’ll continue doing that.

The Crust of the Matter

One thing that is coming in pretty hardcore is my push for bridge building and embracing uncertainty. I’m actually pretty panicky about this. If anything, I have seen more and more people just copy pasting opinions from social media and news outlets and to be honest they all sound so darn angry. I wrote a while ago about how boolean logic in opinion forming is actually harming us but I think it’s getting worse for some reason.

What I mean is this: statements that begin with “if” tend to flatten the complexity of the narrative. Ultimately it’s a colonial attitude to come up with easy fixes.

Let’s use an example I used in the past: “If you vote for Trump you’re transphobic.” On the surface that looks true because Trump has been very unambiguous in his push to make it harder for people like us. But would we really say that people who voted for Trump are transphobic? Or do the consequences of voting for Trump lead to transphobia. There is a subtle but very important difference there.

The difference is a lesson we should’ve been taught as kids: while our actions may be unkind, we are not unkind. While our actions may be deplorable, we are not deplorable.

Bytes

Can I be very geeky? I love the Apple Notes app haha. I used to be a Notion super user and when I say super user - it kinda freaked people out how organized my project management was. Last year I started favoring apps that are just quick to open and write in and Apple Notes has implemented some features that have been hugely helpful and I’m now 909 notes in.

The app is especially useful for writings songs because an update a while ago allowed me to record voice memos directly into my note. The way I write songs is all over the place. I have a bunch of lyrics that feel like nice hooks, I have themes that I want to incorporate in songs, and I have recordings of riffs, vocal lines, refrains etc. Previously I had a crapload of voice recordings, notes all over the place for my lyrics, and then somehow I had to patch everything together in one song but those days are over.

I finished writing a song called “always been together/apart” and I can honestly not remember writing a song more smoothly. I had this theme of a push and pull narrative that is about my transition but can be interpreted as a love story. I had a very catchy guitar riff that I knew felt good. I also had a melody that worked well with the song. My problem with song writing is that I want the melody line and syllables to line up perfectly and I end up giving up writings songs way too often. This time every line of the lyrics had some audio recordings with it both to practice enunciation but also to see if I like the melody line. All in one file. I’m so satisfied.

Ok thanks for listening to my geeky notes talk bye.

Pie to Go

🧙🏽‍♀️ I watched Wicked for the first time yesterday. Never seen the play, never read the book, and did’t really know the story besides having seen the Wizard of Oz back in the days (no not the technicolor days, I’m not THAT old). Ya’ll, please warn me about themes of racisms and antisemitism next time. I was planning on having a casual movie night! That shit was triggering!

🏐 Last dodge ball game of the season before the tournament next week! I can wholeheartedly say that I’m a fan of dodgeball. It does help that I’m not afraid of balls. But also it’s satisfying smashing balls into people 🤔

❄️ Snow is coming. At least that’s what has been told to us for the last couple of days but it’s still sunny outside. Will Richmond ever see snow?